My Experience of the Lord’s Calling

I am 21 years old and was brought up in Wellington, after living for eight years in Singapore, the country I was born in. My parents were well-educated and from a middle class background. They believed in the Lord and were baptised in their first year here in New Zealand. So a large part of my childhood was in the church life.

I first believed when I was 14 and was baptised straight away. At the time, although I knew God, I was still unsure of a lot of things concerning Jesus and also I did not experience Him much at all. To me Jesus was the God in heaven whom I believed in. I did not experience Him much until earlier this year (2000). Between my baptism and 2000, I went through a period of turmoil in my life. I was constantly depressed and had much anxiety about life’s pressures—social, financial, and educational. I found that as fast as I could deal with problems, new ones came up. It seemed that my environment was eating me alive. Deep within I was unsatisfied with life. I was convinced that there is more to life than dealing with problems all the time.

I would sometimes pray to Jesus, and although my situation did not change I found strength through prayer. Gradually the Lord opened my eyes concerning sin, the nature that dwelt in me. I realised that I was a sinner and that only by receiving Him into me as my life I could be forgiven. In God’s eyes I died with Christ 2000 years ago. I simply had to believe it for it to become my reality. Now I live by Christ—by the constant exercise of my spirit—by praying and also calling on His name I receive a deep enjoyment of Christ. It is this enjoyment that strengthens me while I’m studying or even doing housework.

Through such enjoyment my relationship with Christ deepened, and in March of 2000 I had a sense deep in my spirit that the Lord wanted me to follow Him and go to a Christian training. Now I am at the training learning to live a life fully by the spirit to serve the Lord. I don’t know what the Lord will lead me to do in the future but I know whatever it is will be for the mutual satisfaction of God and man.  Q S

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